A Question Of Humility...

I share from my heart on this blog and in my life (to the best of my ability). Sometimes as a result I get slammed by some holier than thou type, or some unenlightened individual. I can feel their judging stares and hear their condemning words and you know what? Fuck them. May God continue to help them. I don't go for the arguing and I try to avoid the discussions and attempts to convince them that I'm nobodys piece of shit. I just look at them like the imperfect sickos that they are. The are, after all only human and subject to the whims of their shortcomings same as me. As I have grown and learned to accept myself; flaws and all, I am developing more acceptance of others. It seems easier to have acceptance of self and others when things are going the way I think they should but when they aren't: Dear Lord things can get tough. I have been becoming increasingly aware of my own character defects in action lately and it's been hard to keep my head up. I have a habit for believing in the illusions that I create - what I mean is "putting on airs" pretending that "everything" in my life is fine and dandy, making things appear (to outsiders) to be this way - then falling into the trap of believing that this "should" be so. I think they call it placing unrealistic expectations on myself, God & life. So once again I turn to the power greater than me known as the spiritual principles found in the 12 step. I just keep working on me and working on me until I reach a point of surrender, acceptance and freedom. Thank God for this programs simplicity. All I have to do is work the steps and keep growing up. JUST FOR TODAY: I am ok, just as I am flaws and all(yeah I could do better and I might), my life is ok too (and yes it could and might become better)- but no matter what; as long as I don't go and get wasted, I have a chance to make things better.