Is masterbation a form of 'self-love'? Is it some nasty thing that only perverts do? Is it just another normal, natural thing that normal people do? Good question. The answer is... whatever you think it is. We create our own realities sometimes, and that reality can be ugly if its based on misinformation. Why am I even talking about this? because me & a friend were discussing it and it was revealed that I think masterbation is disgusting (unless it's a women on an adult movie) and that if I do it then I am disgusting and sneaky and nasty and perverted. Well needless to say I have done it and I have felt all those self-esteem assassinating feelings. So my friend and I were discussing how I came to view masterbating as such a bad thing. Something from my childhood - go figure. I'm a grown man operating on a child's information - sound familiar to anyone? Nah not this crowd, I'm sure. But anyway I just decided to take a leap of faith and share this in hopes that maybe I can get some relief. Because I don't want to continue feeling like a sicko if I decide to "periodically" indulge. Maybe somebody will have the courage to share something profound (which usually turns out to be profoundly simple) with me. Maybe people will be too afraid to touch this topic. Maybe people feel the same way I do. Just for today - I'm not in denial anymore - I have done it, and I know I'm not a sicko...
I'll just be glad when my mind believes that too. Whew ! feels like I just did a "mini-fourth step". JUST FOR TODAY: somebody had the courage to say some 'out there' things when I first got here & it helped me get freedom from that feeling of terminal uniqueness. Maybe it's my time to give back. And remember those that judge, don't matter & those that matter, don't judge.
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Ken Wilber has a youtube video about a 'spiritual' perspective on sex. called Ken Wilber - Erogenous Zones of Life, here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhvMSlirh5k
the upshot is that if you are on a genuine spiritual path, you have a broad range of sexual options that are ethical.
William Blake, (see wikipedia) and Bono, are other very devotional people who refuse to interpret religiosity as meaning any sort of curtailment of earthly pleasure. Its not a new idea!
Remember, feelings aren't facts. if you do feel 'bad', it means very little. Just some baggage to ignore, and act as if anyway. There are no 'magic wands', but you would do better to not 'buy into' the bad feelings you have about your sexuality, in whatever way you express it. Basically, guilt and shame are VERY unspiritual..
There is nothing wrong at all with masturbation. It's natural to want to make yourself feel good.
I can say personally, the only time I get a twinge of embarrassment over it is in the split second that I have "finished". I don't know what that's about but I have noticed it before. Usually I just don't let it bother me.
I just get on with the rest of my life.
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