Dammit...

man i have a few good days and BAM ! here comes the rain again.
i hate this. God knows i hate this. i pray all day long. i share about it. i help others, i keep busy and i still have my hands full trying not to cry.
i know its getting better.
i feel its almost over.
i know its for the best.
i thank God everyday and night.
i just hate the hurt.
i just hate the change.
i just hate losing the girl.
i hate that i fucked it all up.
i hate that it ain't never going to be the same again.
i know that God has something better for me and i better get busy growing so that i can be ready for it.
i know that good will come of this.
i know that God knows best.
i know that i am worthy to be loved & i believe that i will have the courage to love again.
i know that i am growing and will be able to help somebody (already am helping people).
i know that i have assets.
that i am a good man and father and friend.
but just for today the best news is that
i know that i aint got to use.

trouble is knowing all this doesn't take the hurt away.