The Storm Is Over ?

Nah, i won't even lie to myself like that, real feelings don't just go away like that.
sometimes it is difficult to keep my focus, other times it is easier.
i keep reminding myself that God is working everything out perfectly, i remind myself that i can't see it but i trust Him. i remind myself that this too shall pass and is passing. i remind myself over and over again that i dont have to look back anymore - that my blessings lie ahead. i remind myself that God is good and that His plan is perfect. That He loves me and has my best interests at heart. That everything i want is not always what is best for everybody.

i remind myself again and again and yet...

sometimes i just have to cry.
sometimes i just have to grieve.
this has been a great loss to me and like others before me i can get through it.
but i have to give thanks to my Higher Power who has given me the strength to experience (and survive) my emotions without having to act out in anyway.
i dont HAVE to dial that number, or drive by that house or send that text message.
i may want to sometimes but i dont HAVE to anymore.

i remind myself that it is ok to feel my pain and that i am ok and worthy to be loved and that i am loved.

i remind myself all the time, and i have to do this because the disease that i suffer from does not take vacations.

we truly keep what we have only with vigilance.